Proper Etiquettes

  Presenting hadas

Present hadas is a general ceremony in Southwest China's Tibet Autonomous Region. People present hadas in weddings, funerals, or celebrations; when having an audience with people of higher status; when praying on the religious forms; and when sending off friends, and so on. Hada is a kind of raw silk that is spun sparsely like a net. Another kind of hada is made with excellent silk. Hada is often 3 to 5 chi or 1 to 2 zhang (1 zhang equals about 3.3 meters) in length.

Presenting hadas expresses heartedness and loyalty. Hadas are always white, as since ancient times, Tibetans have regarded white as the symbol of chastity and fortune. Certainly there are multicolored hadas, such as blue, white, yellow, green, and red. Blue means sky, white means cloud, green means rivers, red means divinity, and yellow means earth.

The multicolored hadas are to be used with cai jian (swords), which are the best ceremonious gifts offered to Bodhisattva statues and close relatives. The Doxy of Buddhism explains the multicolored hadas are used on special occasions, as they are the costume of bodhisattvas.

Hadas were introduced to Tibet in the Yuan Dynasty (1271-1368). When Baciba-Saqia Fawang met with Hubilie -- the first Emperor of the Yuan Dynasty --, he brought a hada back to Tibet. At that time, both sides of hadas had the design of the Great Wall, with characters of Ji Xiang Ru Yi (Good fortune as wishes) written in the middle. Subsequently, people attached religious significance to the hadas, said they were the streamers of fairy.

 Proposing a toast and tea

Tibetans are all hospitable. When Tibetans offer guests Qingke (which is a kind of wine made of highland barley), they fill wineglasses and offer them to the guests. The guests should take a wineglass in both hands, then raise the glass with the right hand, and, using the third finger of the left hand, dip into the wine lightly and flick to the sky. That means heavenly-mindedness. Guests should then flick a second and third time, which means terra-respectfulness and Buddha-respectfulness respectively.

Such a kind of traditional custom tells people the derivation of Qingke is connected nearly with the benefaction of the sky, the terra, and Buddha. So before drinking, people should toast the deity.

There is a custom to follow when drinking. The host takes the first sip of his wine and then drinks it down. When it's the guest's turn, first, he or she should drink a little and allow the host to fill it back up. Then the guest drinks a little again and the host fills it up once more, and so on. When the glass is filled the fourth times, the guest downs it all; only in this way will the host feel respected. The more the guest drinks, the much happier the host will be because of his or her excellent wine brewing.

When toasting to male guests, Tibetans always use a dock-glass or big bowl; for female guests, they always use a small can or bowl. When drinking tea, the guests should wait for the cup to be offered to them before drinking; otherwise, they will be considered disrespectful.

To entertain guests with tea is a daily etiquette. The guests should not pour their own drinks. Instead, the y should wait until the host presents the tea to them. According to the Tibetan custom, the buttered tea is drunk in separate sips, and after each sip the host refills the bowl to the brim. Thus guests never drain their bowl yet it is constantly topped up.

If the guests do not wish to drink, the best thing to do is leave the tea untouched until the time comes to leave and then down the bowl, except for a very small amount. In this way Tibetan etiquette is observed and the host will not be offended.

 Pilgrimage

The immediate motivations of pilgrimage are many, but for the ordinary Tibetan it amounts to a means of accumulating merit or good luck. The lay practitioner might go on a pilgrimage in the hope of winning a better rebirth, curing an illness, ending a spate of bad luck, or even fulfilling a vow to take a pilgrimage if a bodhisattva granted a wish.

In Tibet there are countless sacred destinations, ranging from lakes and mountains to monasteries and caves that once served as meditation retreats. Specific pilgrimages are often proscribed for specific ills; certain mountains, for example, expiate certain sins.

 Greeting

When two friends meet again after a long separation, one friend's hand should not be put up on the other friend's shoulder. When you express your respect to somebody, you should add "La" to his or her name. Tibetan consists of both honorific and non-honorific languages. Using honorific language with respecters and guests shows your respect.

When you walk on the road, you should not cross in front of other people and, when encountering others, you should give way to them out of courtesy.

 Eating

At a dinner, you should not eat too much each time. Also, try not to make any sounds while eating, including biting, and drinking.